What I would not give to still have that old knife. It was not long before I graduated to a swiss army knife. For the uninformed (and any one that has never watched MacGyver), the swiss army knife is a mulit-purpose knife with a large blade and a variety of other tools which usually include a screwdriver and can opener. In the late 1800's, Switzerland's army began distributing such knives to it's officers - and thus the Swiss Army Knife was born. Over the years, it's utility and variety of available tools has made it synonymous with versatility. A coworker was once asked to do a job that was outside his normal skill set and range of responsibility. He answered, "I am a Swiss Army Knife - I can do anything." Indeed, the Swiss Army Knife is sometimes lampooned for the variety of functions it can perform.
Most everyone knows about the swiss army knife in general, but only the discerning know about the "Original" vs "Genuine" distinction. Early on, I discovered that the knife's popularity had spawned many cheap imitators. I also noticed that quality ones had a crossbow (not an umbrella like I thought at first) engraved on the bottom of the main blade. They would also say "OFFICER SUISSE" and many would have "VICTORIA" engraved on it as well.
I soon learned that this was the mark of a Victorinox and that there was another "real" swiss army knife made by Wenger.
It turns out they are both real swiss army knives (but this can be said for only those two brands). Victorinox is branded as the "Original Swiss Army Knife" and Wenger is the "Genuine Swiss Army Knife". I gravitated toward Victorinox as the superior brand much the same as Coke is better than Pepsi. As if the superior design of the Victorinox can opener over the lesser Wenger version was not enough and the fact that Victorinox later aquired Wenger and mercifully allowed them to keep their brand....as if these two facts were not enough, the clincher is that MacGyver used a Victorinox in all but 3 of the 97 episodes where a swiss army knife was employed. Inconceivable as it sounds, there were 42 episodes where he did not use a knife at all. It seems that he favored the Spartan.
This brings me to my preferred model. Boy Scouts and Swiss Army Knives go together like peanut butter and chocolate. Each is wonderful on their own, but together they are amazing. I like to carry the Huntsman.
The stock Huntsman has a corkscrew. The Boy Scouts figured that 12-18 years did not really need to open anything that was hidden behind a cork, so they wisely replaced it with a phillips head screwdriver. The other two tools that make this model stand out are the saw (what self respecting Boy Scout does not need a saw from time to time) and the scissors. Ah, the scissors - those glorious scissors. It is that which inspired me to write today's entry. Before I get to my scissor story, let me tell you about my Huntsman.
My knife has been put to good use and well tested. I have used from the backwoods to the front office and everywhere in between. Some where along the way, I noticed it was getting a little grimy. What better way to clean it than put it in boiling water to remove all the impurities? Appearanlty, boiling water considered the glue holding the red plastic covering to the metal to be an impurity - and away it went. For several years, my poor little knife was half naked. Red covered on one side and naked on the other. Finally I restored its dignity and glued the other side back on. I can easily tell my warped sided little buddy from any other look-alikes.
Back to the scissors. One of the most frequent uses of my swiss army knife is clipping my fingernails with the scissors. They just work so much better than any cuticle scissors or fingernail clippers that I have come across. Over the past couple of weeks, my nails have reached the stage of needing some attention. My knife occasionally likes to play hide and seek from me and has eluded me for several weeks now. It does this from time to time but always comes back to me. This time, however, I was starting to become desperate. After looking in all my pockets and my gym bag and my car and my bedside, I still could not find it. If I did not do something soon, I would have to paint my nails. To quote that great maritime philosopher (Popeye): "I've had all me can stands and me can't stands no more". In desperation Istole borrowed my wife's nail kit. The clippers just would not give the satisfying "click" sound as they broke through...because they wouldn't break through. I tried the little scissors. The just slipped around the nail side ways like a piece paper sliding through children's safety scissors. Then it hit me. I had the perfect idea. I dashed to the closet and pulled out the shoe box. You know the one. The one with my grandfather's watch, my set of Superman collecting cards, my Eagle Scout ribbon, my pinewood derby car, and other such prized possessions. I opened it up and rummaged through it. There it was. The object of my search. My SwissChamp. The one my mother had bought for me IN SWITZERLAND when she took me as a 12 year old. I know the Huntsman will turn up soon. I am not worried. But today, the SwissChamp, that 3.5" beauty with all of its 33 various tools, would save the day. I found the scissors and trimmed my nails to manicured perfection. My swiss army knife did not let me down...and it never has.
It turns out they are both real swiss army knives (but this can be said for only those two brands). Victorinox is branded as the "Original Swiss Army Knife" and Wenger is the "Genuine Swiss Army Knife". I gravitated toward Victorinox as the superior brand much the same as Coke is better than Pepsi. As if the superior design of the Victorinox can opener over the lesser Wenger version was not enough and the fact that Victorinox later aquired Wenger and mercifully allowed them to keep their brand....as if these two facts were not enough, the clincher is that MacGyver used a Victorinox in all but 3 of the 97 episodes where a swiss army knife was employed. Inconceivable as it sounds, there were 42 episodes where he did not use a knife at all. It seems that he favored the Spartan.
This brings me to my preferred model. Boy Scouts and Swiss Army Knives go together like peanut butter and chocolate. Each is wonderful on their own, but together they are amazing. I like to carry the Huntsman.
The stock Huntsman has a corkscrew. The Boy Scouts figured that 12-18 years did not really need to open anything that was hidden behind a cork, so they wisely replaced it with a phillips head screwdriver. The other two tools that make this model stand out are the saw (what self respecting Boy Scout does not need a saw from time to time) and the scissors. Ah, the scissors - those glorious scissors. It is that which inspired me to write today's entry. Before I get to my scissor story, let me tell you about my Huntsman.
My knife has been put to good use and well tested. I have used from the backwoods to the front office and everywhere in between. Some where along the way, I noticed it was getting a little grimy. What better way to clean it than put it in boiling water to remove all the impurities? Appearanlty, boiling water considered the glue holding the red plastic covering to the metal to be an impurity - and away it went. For several years, my poor little knife was half naked. Red covered on one side and naked on the other. Finally I restored its dignity and glued the other side back on. I can easily tell my warped sided little buddy from any other look-alikes.
Back to the scissors. One of the most frequent uses of my swiss army knife is clipping my fingernails with the scissors. They just work so much better than any cuticle scissors or fingernail clippers that I have come across. Over the past couple of weeks, my nails have reached the stage of needing some attention. My knife occasionally likes to play hide and seek from me and has eluded me for several weeks now. It does this from time to time but always comes back to me. This time, however, I was starting to become desperate. After looking in all my pockets and my gym bag and my car and my bedside, I still could not find it. If I did not do something soon, I would have to paint my nails. To quote that great maritime philosopher (Popeye): "I've had all me can stands and me can't stands no more". In desperation I
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